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Team
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Scissor Army
Team Name Scissor Army
Leader General Cutman
Members General Cutman, Mesmerman, Ascendant Androids, Seven Mercenaries
HQ Elysium, Desert Gulch

The Scissor Army is General Cutman's personal force, composed of Robot Masters he has upgraded and countless numbers of Scissor Joes. Few are able to resist its power of destruction.

Whatever the universes and the Officers, several things are recurrent about the Scissor Army : its commander, General Cutman, and its goal : extinction of mankind.

Series Information[]

Orange Hell[]

CutSkullIcon5

The SA's original logo

The very first incarnation of this Army was mostly composed of Desert Joes, commanded by the General. It has been stopped by the Sinister Six before it could be unleashed on the world. A vast majority of the troops were destroyed when the base of Desert Gulch was destroyed to ensure no one would use them.

Revenge of the Scissor Army[]

Unknown to the Sinister Six, there were more members of the Scissor Army than expected. A few months after the end of Orange Hell, a retrieve party, led by Colonel Red, saved the General, and launched a new attack on the world.

This incarnation of the Scissor Army was led by various Officers, based on the Ascendant Androids (MM5), Wily's Warriors (MM2) and Titanium Titans (the MM8 Team of that time). Famous members include, but are not limited to :

  • Colonel Red, second-in-command of the SA
  • Captain Crashman, commander of the Earth Forces
  • The Judge (Searchman)
  • Specialist Heatman

After the Revenge[]

SAcommand chain

The SA's ranks after RotSA

What happened to the Scissor Army after the Revenge is unclear. However, it is almost certain that they finally defeated the allies (Sinister Six and Mechanical Maniacs), and incorporated King's robots into their ranks.

New World[]

When General Cutman landed in the Team Universe, he immediately worked on a new version of the Scissor Army. This one was composed of his own clones, along with the S6 Rogue Gallery. It was quickly destroyed in the Sinister Six Finale.

Business Of War[]

NewSAlogo2

Guess who's back.

During and before the Business of War, the General recruited several Robot Masters and Rogues in order to create Elysium on this "new" world.

The members of this Army included (though, not specifically at the same time):

These Officers were backed up by countless numbers of Scissor Joes, and other special troops as well.  With countless numbers as well as the General's secret control over the shutdown code the Scissor Army was nearly victorious in conquering the world.  However, the revelation that the General was more interested in war than the peace afterwards led to a split with Napalmman before the General himself was nearly destroyed by the Mechanical Maniacs and his ally Mesmerman.  In the final battle with Mesmerman the General himself came to deliver the final blow against his former ally and his own army - deeming the world not worthy of the peace he attempted to bring to it.  

Scissor Army Redux[]

Despite the near total collapse of his forces, the General returned and brought back some of the Scissor Army as well in the time between the Mechs' Series 6 and 7 .  Unknown to the world the Scissor Army returned and had been gaining steady growth until the Mechs returned themselves (In Series 7's Life after Life).  After some time had passed a new Scissor Army Starman made his debut and broke his fellow Ascendant Androids from prison.  With the General destroyed once and for all the identity of the robot behind the reformed Scissor Army was unknown but was finally revealed, to the surprise of all, to be Chimeraman, who had patiently rebuild the Scissor Army during his 15 year absence.

A master of patience maybe, but not a master of arms, Chimera reorganized the army into terrorist-like cells, each operating individually, but without guidance. He was unable to get the Ascendant Androids to work as a team and made the mistake of ordering a coordinated attack on Monsteropolis which allowed Crorq to track the teleportation signal of the Scissor Army troops back to Chiemra's base. The Mechs, Cossack's Comrades, World's Strongest, and Sterling Sentinels, along with many Police Bots all attacked his base, shattering Chimera's army and capturing the would-be world conqueror himself.

Orange Hell Revisited[]

A short time later (at the start of Series 9), in unrelated circumstances, Leon Graves returned to the world from the Orange Hell Universe and he revealed the fate of the original Scissor Army.

Without General Cutman to keep them together and after conquering most of their enemies and humankind the Scissor Army turned on each other. With the Army in tatters that universes' Gary (as Red) and the remains of the Sinister Six wiped most of the Scissor Army out. With the world in need of repair Leon remade the portal back to his world for supplies only to be attacked by Captain Crashman, Heatman, and Metalman.

The portal to the OH universe was destroyed and Leon became Sparkman. He and the Mechs finally destroyed the remnants of the original Scissor Army.

Scissor Army forces[]

BoWar-SASniperJoe
BoWar-SaharaJoe
BoWar-ForestJoe
BoWar-SnowJoe
BoWar-NightshadeJoe
BoWar-SplitterJoe
BoWar-SWATJoe
 

The Scissor Army (especially during Business of War) is comprised of many different kinds of Joes, known collectively as "Scissor Joes". There are many different types of Joes; some even being specially made by a CO for their own use. However, these are the main types of Joes.

  • SA Sniper Joes (aka "Scissor Joes")  - A lot more menacing than those little bitches that cower behind their little shields, huh? They come in a wide variety of "flavours", but we'll get to that in a moment.  This particular Joe is the standard "new" Sniper Joe manufactured by Gavel Arms Ltd. for many world military powers. He is an upgrade in every way possible to the original Sniper Joe, which has since become obsolete. Note the colour scheme- it isn't meant to pay homage to the first Joes, but is instead meant to be a utilitarian paint scheme, designed to fit a large variety of fighting environments.  Of course, customers were able to purchase additional paint schemes, and even camouflage patterns. Unless otherwise noted, these Joes are all equipped exactly the same, which will be detailed at the end of this post.
  • Sahara Joes - The Sahara Joe returns! He is almost identical to his old RotSA self, though this one is a bit brighter to help him blend in with desert and mountainous terrain better. As their name suggests, Sahara Joes were popular among Sahara nations, and were deployed all around the Mid East before the War began.
  • Forest Joes - These were purchased by the US military and Southeast Asian countries. China has taken a liking to them, and purchased the lion's share of the Forest Joes, however. This led many to speculate that China was intending to take over at least one of its neighbouring countries.  
  • Snow Joes - These became a common sight in Eastern Europe and northern Asia in the last few months. These Joes differ from the others due to their slightly tweaked optical units, which automatically dim visual intake to avoid snow blinding. 
  • Nightshade Joes - These also feature a differently calibrated optical array, and can make use of four different visual modes: regular sight, enhanced night vision, thermal, and inferred. The US and Africa seemed very fond of these units.
  • Splitter Joes - Also called Urban Joes, are used primarily in densely populated areas, and feature a more finely tuned targeting system (at the cost of long range capabilities). Probably the most rare, these Joes weren't as popular with world military powers, and were marketed mostly towards large, well to do cities. Most cities, however, filled orders for...
  • The SWAT Joe - Featuring an even more finely-tuned targeting sensor, which made it custom-tuned for interior fighting. Not shown here is the SWAT Joe's shield, which is made of a high impact plexiglas (it is completely transparent like most modern day riot shields). According to the orders filed, the SWAT Joe seemed destined to replace the aging Place Robots around the world as a hot new item to have. However, the War broke out before they were shipped, making SWAT Joes heavily available for the SA, and deployed to urban areas exclusively. Their long range capabilities are virtually nil, but they are usually flanked by any number of regular Sniper Joes to make up for this, and often use their shields to protect the other types of Joes. They are the most dangerous in terms of close range combat.

As you can see, Joes are always armed with at least three important pieces of hardware- a high-powered, multi-use plasma rifle, a large caliber plasma pistol, and a stainless steel combat knife.

The Gavel Arms J31 Custom MP rifle is a fine piece of machinery. The pistol grip and can slid fore and aft to allow a user to customize their grip. Positioned above that is the plasma chamber, powered by a pro-strength battery, which can be replaced like conventional ammo clips. The battery is found at the very end of the butt stock. Plasma is gravity fed to the launch chamber near the exit, where high-powered jets of air propel the plasma at nearly 800 MPH using an ion field to control the burst. This rifle can be configured to fire a variety of different shots, and can simulate a full auto, semi auto, shotgun, or a sniper rifle. The Gavel Arms Officer Grade pistol makes use of different technology than the rifle seen here. It fires much like a conventional pistol, but doesn't rely on solid ammunition. It too is battery powered, with the battery being stored in the grip. The aft chamber creates ion "bullets", which are propelled via pressurized air through a plasma tunnel in the barrel. The ion bullet catches a coating of plasma in the process. This ensures the pistol is absolutely deadly at close or medium range, packing even more power than the rifle. However, its range is limited due to the ion bullets dispersing rather quickly, and the battery's tenancy to tap out after only 20 shots.

The combat knife here holds a fine edge after repeated usage, and can gash even tempered steel. Its grip is hollow and light.

SA Joes feature numerous equipment upgrades compared to the old Sniper Joes, including:

  • Advanced optics and audio sensors.
  • Inferred trip-detectors mounted on the ankles. Essentially, these are another set of eyes on the feet, watching closely for mines and traps underfoot.
  • Triple-plated steel construction. Less expensive than titanium, but nearly as strong.
  • Kevlar body suits, made with as few seams as possible, providing an air tight uniform. Keeps containments at bay.
  • The very latest in military AI. Gavel Arms Ltd worked closely with the US Marines and British SAS to create the ultimate soldier intelligence. This program correctly simulates a human veteran soldier in tactile situations, and is an expert in warfare AND peacekeeping detail. 

Order yours today!

Specific members of the Scissor Army have customized their own Joes based ont heir on quirks.  These are all generally as skilled as a standard Scissor Joe.

  • The Dark Joe - Used by Wraithman, these are regular Joes painted black.
  • The Holy Order - Used by Geminiman, these Joes possess the power of invisibility and holographic Geminiman disguises.
  • The Spotlight Joe - Used by Captain Quint, these Joes were modified to nullify Shadowman's Shadow Warp ability by projecting a bright light over a large area.
  • The Frost Joe - Modified Snow Joes. They use freeze guns.
  • Crew Joes (Crew and Engineers) - Used by Captain Quint aboard the Marauder. They're divided in two "groups"; the actual Crew (composed of weaponless Joes, they act as the the engineers) and the defence Crew. In terms of appearance, they're some crazy mix between a Sniper/Scissor Joe, a Zaku (for the face, the axe and shoulder pads) and a Games Workshop Terminator (for the general body structure and heavy weaponry). 
  • The Mystery Joe - Joes Mysteryman uses as his own personal "troupe"; they share the same colour scheme as their boss. 
  • The Flame Joe - As the name suggests, these Joes use heat and flames.

The Siege Joe

Siegejoe

In Stage 2, the Siege Joes were introduced when a unit made their appearance alongside Wraithman in Rome. A few of those Joes later appeared in Alaska to aid the attack there. Whereas in Stage 2 there was one squadron of 10 Joes, in Stage 3 and beyond, there are 30 Joes, divided into two squads of 15. One of these squadrons is accounted for, and the other has yet to be assigned. The reason that there is a limited number is that there are only a limited number of Siege Joes, and they are still in the testing stages.

Siege Joes specs:

  • Durable Armor: They have fairly tough armour. A bit more tank-like than a lot of units, but a bit less tank-like than Hardman.
  • Steady: These things are built on the design of a very, VERY stable RM. They're hard to knock down, and even harder to KEEP down.
  • 2-Stage Canister Buster: Think Hunter Fuel Rod Cannon from Halo, but less explodey and more flamethrowery. For the uninitiated, it's basically a big stream of angry plasma that will melt you like butter. Not much stands up very well to more than a second or twos exposure to this thing, including the Siege Joes themselves.
  • Short Range Jump: An independent teleportation with a working range of only a couple of yards. This allows for stealth insertions and surprise attacks. A Siege Joe can only jump about once every thirty minutes, due to the energy required. This ability also becomes less useful if the ECM/ECCM Suite is destroyed, as the equipment is required to calculate accurate jumps through obstacles, such as into a building or underground bunker. 
  • Counter and Countercountermeasures (ECM and ECCM): Radar jamming and radar jammer jamming equipment which renders most normal forms of communication outside of shouting useless. It statics the hell out of dedicated team comm. lines, and forget about public channels. This helps mask their presence and help them maintain their element of surprise. All of this equipment is located in the armoured shell of the head and neck, so destroying that, while not rendering the Siege Joe inoperable, will decrease its effectiveness.
  • SA Joe core: The original Siegema'am was a human wired into a cybernetic shell. These are Joes wired into modified shells. As such, they have the standard brand of intelligence and cunning afforded to SA troopers, and are especially good at working with each other.
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